Kaban ni Mulong: MGA PAGTULON-AN
Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly
wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens
the door there stands Bob, the next door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you £800
to drop that towel." After thinking for a moment, the woman
drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a
few seconds, Bob hands her £800 and leaves. The woman
wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she
gets to the bathroom, her husband asks "Who was that?"
"It was Bob the next door neighbor" she replies.
"Great!" the husband says, "did he say anything about the £800
he
owes me?"
Moral of the story: If you share critical information
pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may
be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her
legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had
an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid
his hand up her leg. The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm
129?" The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears,
he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again
said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest
apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak". Arriving at the
convent,
the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the
priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, "Go forth and seek,
further up, you will find glory."
Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your
job, you might miss a great opportunity.
Lesson 3
A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are
walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub
it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give
each of you just one wish". "Me first! Me first!" says the admin
clerk.
"I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat,
without a care in the world". Puff! She's gone.
"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I
want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an
endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my
life". Puff! He's gone. "OK, you're up", the Genie says to the
manager.
The manager says, "I want those two back in the office
after lunch".
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
Lesson 4
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A
small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like
you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat
on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and
ate it.
Moral of the story : To be sitting and doing nothing, you
must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be
able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I
haven't
got the energy. "Well, why don't you nibble on some of
my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with
nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually
gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the
second branch.
Finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly
perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer,
who shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story : Bullsh*t might get you to the top, but
it won't keep you there.
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so
cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he
was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow
dung, he
began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually
thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon
began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing
and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered
the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him
out and ate him.
Moral of the story:
1 Not everyone who sh!ts on you is your enemy
2 Not everyone who gets you out of sh!t is your friend
3 And when you're in deep sh!t, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
This ends the 3 minute management course.
(Bug-os ang pasalamat sa KAHAYAG ngadto sa nagsulat sa paambit nga si Atty. ROMULO M. BACOL. Nagtakuban siya sa pangalang, "MULONG". Gradwado siya sa Abellana National High School, sa dakbayan sa Sugbo isip Valedictiorian. Usa siya ka kanhi COMELEC Supervisor. Gitapos niya ang kursong abogasya sa University of the Philippines. Human sa iyang pagserbisyo sa kagamhanan isip COMELEC Supervisor, milalin siya ngadto sa Tinipong Nasod sa Amerika, nagpaniid ug nagsunod siya sa mga talagsaong butang ug panghitabo nga sarang ikapaambit niya sa mga kahigalaan. Sa pangedaron nga 75 anyos, hinog ug lapad na kaayo ang iyang kahibalo sa lain-laing hisgotanan nga motukbil sa atong inadlaw-adlaw nga talan-awon ug kasinatian.)
(Bug-os ang pasalamat sa KAHAYAG ngadto sa nagsulat sa paambit nga si Atty. ROMULO M. BACOL. Nagtakuban siya sa pangalang, "MULONG". Gradwado siya sa Abellana National High School, sa dakbayan sa Sugbo isip Valedictiorian. Usa siya ka kanhi COMELEC Supervisor. Gitapos niya ang kursong abogasya sa University of the Philippines. Human sa iyang pagserbisyo sa kagamhanan isip COMELEC Supervisor, milalin siya ngadto sa Tinipong Nasod sa Amerika, nagpaniid ug nagsunod siya sa mga talagsaong butang ug panghitabo nga sarang ikapaambit niya sa mga kahigalaan. Sa pangedaron nga 75 anyos, hinog ug lapad na kaayo ang iyang kahibalo sa lain-laing hisgotanan nga motukbil sa atong inadlaw-adlaw nga talan-awon ug kasinatian.)
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